I have been reading the book, An Intentional Life
, and there is a line in the book that stirred in my heart.
“Since I had placed God in a box, I lived in one, too. When we take our own limitations and put them on the God who set the planets into orbit, it chains us to a life limited to our own power. Our lack of faith, in turn, hinders the way we see Him and the way He shows up in our lives”.
It got me thinking about all the things I KNEW I had once put in a box and got me thinking hard about all the things I’ve learned that may be keeping me in a box- & therefore God.
This last season has been a season of unlearning for me. With my husband and I getting married before having a wedding, and then getting pregnant, therefore having to push the wedding back further, it got some negative reactions. We had supporters, of course. I am so thankful for them. There were others, though, that had opinions about the way we had done things. We are devout Christians, and although people may not see it, we had our faith at the front and center of our decisions the whole time. Seeing how people judged based on their own ideals made me take a step back and see how much, even when we don’t see it, we judge people based on our own ideals of normality or right and wrong. It led me to lean into Jesus and only care about His thoughts towards me- no matter what judgements we were getting. I knew, no matter what people thought, we honored God in all of our decisions, and moreover, that God had orchestrated everything for His plan and purpose. I was unlearning traditional religious ideals and past beliefs and leaning more into the unique, crazy awesome path God has my husband and I on.
Just as I saw other’s religious views, it also made me evaluate myself. Who had I treated this way? Who had I judged? Who had I tried to keep in a box because of my own ideals?
My husband and I grew up with very different backgrounds. I mean- almost complete opposite. My mom and dad were never married- my mom was a Lutheran, dad was a (non practicing) Muslim- both believing in discipline, hard work and self sufficiency to get you through life. Wade grew up in a large family with married parents of over 35 years. One of seven children who were close knit. Both mom and dad were heads in the church- with his dad being a practicing minister to this day.
Wade grew up with a passion for music, and his parents supported his dream of one day being a music producer. My parents taught me a more “traditional” path, which led me to go to college and get a 4 year degree in business where then I started at a major retail corporation right after graduation.
We had been together for many years, yet I always struggled with his dream of music. I thought to myself “he’s not getting a 4 year education and may not make the money I want him to make... is this relationship for me?”. We battled with that for many years- with me pushing him to get a “normal” 9-5 job and keep music as a hobby. I saw setback after setback in his ventures in music and I didn’t have hope for it... so it was hard for me to understand why he did.
I continued to seek God with it and also asked about my own purpose. When God revealed to me His desire for me to start Free Citizen
, I finally started to understand why my husband would not give up on his passion of music. I learned that his passion of creating music and my passion for Free Citizen
was because of Gods pursuit of us, rather than our pursuit of Him. What if Wade’s passion of music and creating was actually God’s idea and plan? Not even his? May seem like a “duh” response is appropriate, but I had honestly never thought of it like that before. It changed my perspective on everything when it came to my husbands career. And it made me see that I was putting too much faith in our own power than Gods power- which led me to living in bondage and in a box. It’s still been a journey of faith- but one that is believing for big things in my husbands career and mine with Free Citizen. It’s made our relationship 1000x better, and causes us to lean on Gods power rather than our own for things we hope for but do not see. I see the fruits of trusting Jesus, instead of myself and man. He has been so faithful to us and I am beyond thankful for Him in our lives.
I realize that learning Gods way often takes unlearning the worlds way or our churches way or our peers’ way. I love how my husband goes against the flow of this world no matter what people think... crazy to think something about him that I used to resent I now love about him.
Now I want to unlearn even more if that means being free and therefore being able to help others be free. I am thankful for these experiences that break the bondage off of my life- even if it doesn’t feel good in the current season.
What things are burning in your heart that you may have been suppressing? Maybe there are things you have learned that you need to unlearn? Will you join me in seeking God and helping us unlearn things that are not of His will for our lives? I’m lifting you up in prayer, friend, and ask that you lift me up in prayer, too. We are all on this journey together, no matter how different our journeys are!
Until Next Time- Godspeed,